The Comedy World Cup

 The Comedy World Cup, illustrated many top line comedians during the trailer that was run for it; Bill Bailey, Sean Lock, erm...good ones, anyway, they got turned into little animations and zoomed around the screen. And even upon airing, the introduction put on show many loved British sitcoms. So as we can see, it's not entirely unlike the actual build up to a football world cup, wherein the excitable media coverage shoves intoxicating hope up all of our collective noses, before late, the teams actions on the pitch, encourage us all to angrily sneeze it out and get nose-bleeds.

 This underwhelming failure in the face of something that looked to be jam-packed full of success, will not be unfamiliar to England fans. But for those who do not follow the national football team, fear not, because there is The Comedy World Cup.

 The opening 'episode' of The Comedy World Cup, is about as thrilling as a qualification group, Jo Brand, Dave Spikey and Shappi Khorsandi representing Andorra down one end, whilst Jason Manford, Nicholas Parsons and Paul Chowdhry, represent San Marino down the other. If you recognise all six of these comedians, you win a prize. I have not prepared a prize, because no one will earn said prize, so please do not enter as calls may still be charged.

David Tennant showing off his acting skills. They call this the 'resigned to his fate', look.

 I would rather not go in to criticising the comedians individually (although I will say the sooner this country produces a good female comedian, the better! I am sick of seeing Khorsandi & Brand in particular, get pushed through the door every week for being female, as opposed to actually funny - whilst I have no doubt that some excellent female comedians are out there somewhere waiting to be picked up). But this is not an A List. Can a programme be criticised for that? Yes, if it markets itself as having an A List, which The Comedy World Cup did. If it had advertised itself as The Comedy League Cup, I might have left it alone.

 The premise is simple; a quiz show, where the questions are all about comedy. This is communicated via several clips of what are genuinely funny comedy moments and stand-up clips. But it's not produced by the show, it's just being exhibited for the purpose of point-gaining amongst low-standard comedians. Channel 4 is also the channel that brought you Rude Tube, the programme that makes you watch YouTube on television - meanwhile no one has seemed to grasp that YouTube is actually You've Been Framed in disguise, but for some reason watching Rude Tube is cool, because it's hosted by Alex Zane.

 Likewise, quite apart from tagging this weak show with the mass-appeal of being a 'world cup', it is also fronted by Doctor Who a.k.a David Tennant a.k.a Hamlet, who was recently voted the most likeable person in the entire channel 4 studio! So, we have lads who like the idea of a world cup, fat girls who think David Tennant will love them for who they are - I smell a hit.

 I'm wrong though. David Tennant looks completely out of place (despite his being the funniest person on it) and struggles to add some much needed energy to a very slow quiz show. This programme is designed to generate disinterest. The studio basked in dull red light of the kind you see when you rub your eyes very hard (which I did a lot during the run time, mostly out of disbelief & exhaustion). In addition, when you are showing clips of things like 'Allo 'Allo and Sean Lock's stand-up at the Apollo, its very unfair (and stupid) to show the audience the far superior quality of comedy that they could be watching. On Gold. Or Dave. It's like eating in Pizza Hut, taking a window seat and being given a tantalising glimpse into the Pizza Express opposite. At which point you look down at your food and realise how bad stuffed crust is.

 It's a shame really; like stuffed crust pizza, the show is not entirely a bad concept. I took some small pleasure in being able to answer the questions at lightning quick speed (spotting a scene from Annie Hall, completing lines from Areoplane) and I imagine those older than myself might enjoy the brief moments of nostalgia in seeing long dead comedy clips from failed sitcoms of their greater youth.

 But the show is half an hour too long and as if it wasnt dull enough, it drags on like an episode of Lost. It seems very regrettable that even with the charming David Tennant at the helm (although charm is very often being another word for 'bland' in television), that the entire show is bereft of any chemistry whatsoever. It has less chemistry than a...than a...than a monkey in a suit! Hm. I guess it must be hard to be funny.

 I was reminded by a friend that Shane Allen (Head of Comedy at CH4) recently defected from Channel 4 to the BBC. I smell sabotage. The Comedy World Cup is the bomb that he has left in order to sink the ship, whilst he makes his getaway in the dingy.

 For a good comedy quiz, I suggest sticking with QI XL. Or for a good sitcom, turn to The Thick Of It. Both follow The Comedy World Cup. On the BBC. Not that I'm bias; the BBC is also responsible for Mrs. Browns Boys and the Miranda Show. In fact, fuck it, go and read a book, stupid.